Back to Basics with Egos and Sins

Ultimate Truth, Unconditional Love…Consciously



Preface. 2

Dedication. 4

Introduction. 5

Cosmology. 8

Magic or mysticism.. 10

We are all God. 11

Our soul is eternal 12

Love is unconditional, truthful and conscious. 14

Egos / Sins (the Other Guy). 16

The process: karma, reincarnation and penitence from the rulers. 17

Control your egos or be controlled by them or those of others. 20

Why the system told us so many lies. 23

Jesus Christ Historical and Metaphysical 25

What the spirit world is like and why we are doing all of this. 29

Love then now and it’s reference to Sex. 30

Sex: Tantric (or how to transmute our energy, if we want to). 31

Waking up is easier than we think. 34

Evil and Narcissism.. 35

Ambivalence. 37

Evil and how it is really viewed with narcissism and ambivalence. 39

Chastising. 41

Penitence. 43

Egos and Sins Tied In. 45

How to Be. 46

Transcend the Ego and all is possible: as all is known beyond it. 47

Sexual Analysis to Sexual Healing. 48




This book is about us, all of us and of those that we only imagine to be our angelic hierarchies that watch over us, for few of us have had the ecstasy to be conscious after having interfaced with them. Many of us do not want to interface nor communicate with them, and a few of us do not even want to think that they exist. Just because we do not believe something, does not mean that it is not true.

God is everywhere and is everything, known as 'Love'.


We have all heard that said before, but what does it really mean? God is Love we are told, but then what is Love? God, Love, thus the chicken and the egg routine, or a paradox that gives us a headache and turns us away from it all.


God is Love that is unconditional in beauty, truthful in all manners and conscious of the justice of it all.


God is not wrathful, God does not have favorites, nor is impudent of anything. God is our creator having made the cosmos of Love, balanced energies with a few cosmic 'rules of the game'. Life is a beautiful game that some say is hide and seek with God; we just don't like to admit it as such.


God did not create war, destruction nor evil, God made cosmic rules of balance and we did the rest with the transformation of those energies, for the good and for the not so good of life. And, just as God has many facets to us, each one of us has our own 'soul growth' facet at a different level. We cannot all be in University or Kinder-garden at the same time.


To this end we have written this book that you now anticipating to 'devour' with keenness, in Five parts and some tables. This will allow each one to go into that section which seems the most appropriate, for further investigation. Let your intuition be your guide as to where you want to start.


Each part is a whole unto itself, and is not necessarily put in any order, other than that which we had it pouring out of us as we sat at the laptop and watched our fingers fly across the keyboard. There is a psychological/spiritual section; a section on the higher knowledge or science of ourselves aka 'Gnosis'; a religious section on Jesus the Christ and other ascended masters; a philosophical section (one with humor on our anthropology, or the  'game plan' if you will); and one on fixing it all.


Psychology is scientific and spirituality is not. Spirituality is about our soul and psychology is not. But, when we merge the two, when we go back over the formation of either group, and bring into it the equations the other groups via 'Gnosis', then we start to see our own, inner gnosis and what all this beautiful stuff means. For it is beautiful as it was sent by God and God is everywhere and everything with Love.


During your reading you will find out things about our inner workings that you did not know, that you did not know. You will be amazed, amused and enlightened. Just what life is all about and you may also find out why we are here. There maybe a few tears along the road, but, most importantly you will find that God does in fact exist. That God is in fact everywhere and everything. And, that there is only four words needed to describe God:


Truthful, Conscious, Unconditional  LOVE.

                     L    I     F     E

              G    O    D



                                                                Looks like God intersecting with Love is Life going forward, from the Id.



This book is dedicated to my father who was the greatest example of God (truthful, conscious and unconditional Love) I have yet to meet and to my mother who is the greatest example of Venus.


It is dedicated to my daughter Samantha for choosing me as her Dad and for being a spiritual teacher and student.


To my many friends, alive and dead who have given me so much to live for in this wonderful journey of life (and they still do weather in the here and now or from beyond), from kind words and deeds, to some of the greatest esoteric encounters.


But most of all to that' Lady of unconditional Love', who shared a cosmic dance with me and we found 'God Itself' together. I call her Venus (after my own mother’s ways), and I know that she did incarnate and manifest Venus here and now. From the bottom of my exalted heart and from the universal energy flowing through my soul, I know her as my true soul mate.


I thank her as I would thank God for all that they have taught.

Love, unconditional, conscious and truthful.


May we all, always help and need to help each other and mankind.


 Namaste and God forever.

Edward the Guardian

Earl the defender

Kemp the fighter



This book is about 'you', who 'you' are, and who 'you' are not, and it is for what 'you' really can be.


It is the start of a spiritual analysis that we need to do in order to understand our psychology and thus ourselves. As Freud was stumped on in psychoanalysis, we are defining the 'Id' (that primal chaos within the child that is not understood), as that where the 'seed of the soul' resides and where divine energy will come into being through a spiritual-analysis, awakening and enlightenment. In psychology the Id leads to the ego and then with society (parents, family, culture) it leads to the super-ego.


Einstein talked of us only using 3% of our brain and the rest is untapped. We will try to explain and point out a way that you can tap it all, as, most of us do not have any real inclination as to what spirituality is about, much less how it ties into psychology and thus life itself. We have seen so many of these words and yet did not understand them, so we left it to the theosophists to figure it out as we went on our merry way.


The problem was that, they, never told us what the words meant as they had their own bickering to do and we did not want to get involved.


It is not complicated, nor does it take a 'rocket-scientist' to figure it out. What it takes is Love for yourself and for those around you. With love you can do anything you want, but it must be a conscious love.


So where do we start? How about, neuro-linguistic programming?  Funny word or expression, is it not? Without exploring this a little, most of us will be put off with the use of certain words. (You may want to refer to the neuro-linguistics page for the words that are confusing you and how we are meaning them).


As children growing up we learn the meaning of words from those who teach us, and, often they teach us what they learned and thus not necessarily the intuitive meaning of the word. Take evil as an example, what did it just conjure up in your head, bad demons, terrible people or something just as frightening? But what if it simply means something like, ‘that which is moving away from God’? Then we need to think of, well, what does God mean? A biblical person, a gray bearded man or a universal life energy that is all around us and is ultimate truth and unconditional conscious love.


So, if God is that, then what of ‘evil’? How about defining it just as we said above, ‘that which is moving away from God’? Thus evil is not of God, but a creation of man in as much as we ‘are not moving towards God’ and thus we are being ‘evil’. Or is it too hard to take that we could be evil and not want to admit it. There is a whole section further on that deals amply with this 'evil'.


Suffice to say that anyone in that realm is not going to read this, or will just pull it apart, or worst, stop reading right here. Please, try to understand that it is not 'evil' in the religious sense of the word, but in the psychological sense, as applied to our Id, which does not know that it does not know, what it is or is not, doing. It is the greater part of our brain and our untapped unconscious. It is unconscious only because we have yet to realize that we do not know that we do not know that we have not awaken it.


Slow down and take a deep breathe, this is not too complicated, just a deeper insight to life and love which in reality is God. We just need to think of the words and how we are using them and in what manner we mean them. Remember 'they' said 'they' would create a multitude of languages to confuse us, well guess what, they sure did.


All around us is beauty and love, yet without the truth to it, we just use it at our disposal as society has 'learned' us to do. Why just take it, as ‘it is mine for the taking’? Why not share it, grow it and make it more beautiful?


Venus (Love) would be so happy and Anibus (Truth) would be grateful for our trying to be better at life. It is our life to do with of our own free will. But does that mean to misuse it, to be 'evil'? We now know from all sources that, that is not the plan.


We just need to raise our consciousness, enlighten ourselves and see what can become of all of this. As the saying goes, ‘The truth is out there’. Funny thing is that we (the baby-boomers) seemed to be looking for it in the 60’s and 70’s, only to trade it in for a fast car, fast buck and a fast mate.


All of this was done without Love (God), unconditional, conscious, truthful cosmic Love. Not the kind that is made up of, ‘I love you’, which really means 'I like what you do for me so you can stay and I will stay'. That really interprets as, 'I will have physical contact with you, as you are what I want'. Wants are moving away from God as they are of the egos/sins. Needs are what we have in the soul to grow and be a better spirit for our next incarnation. And the next. And the next.


Yet we must realize that needs are guided by our divineness and not by our animal instincts or our childish (and many times messed up) wants, reactions and desires. Learned behavior patterns that we could have done without. This retribution however is our penitence, by 'Fate', being extracted until we wake up to it all. 


Quite simply put, the egos/sins (those problematic behavior patterns) are like the ones talked of by theology and not the id, ego, and super-ego of psychology. The latter ones do have a tie in with the former ones, but for now let’s focus on the religious ones, as we have all had some exposure to them. Like it or not, please always remember that just because we do not believe something is true does not mean it is not true, it just means that we have yet to experience it.


In psychological parlance the Id (which in the books sub-title is formed by the intersecting of Life and God) is considered our original chaos at birth, that seething energy within us. From our point of view and analysis it is our Godliness ready to jump into action. But this requires a Quantum Leap of Faith. It cannot be measured by science, nor can the psychologists and the like really put their hands on what is inside it, for it is the total unconscious part of us that we must make conscious via annihilation of the egoic ‘defects’ or ‘sins’, by replacing them with our virtues or at least really strengthening the virtues, thus weakening the egos.



Time for a little side trip and hopefully a few laughs, as humor always helps were the egoic mind is involved.


In the realm of us living in this 3 dimensional world a journey of enlightenment to live God as that unconditionally loving and consciously truthful being we can be, the cosmology is not all that important, except for two things that make the exception:


One is that if we have at least a little understanding of where we came from we may be able to figure out our reason for being here and thus our mission, without that we are like a fish out of water.


Second, if we are not interested in the where we are from nor our mission, because we are too caught up in our own self, it can at least help us realize that we are not the 'be all and end all'. That we are not alone and that we are all part of each other.


In this version for those of us who are still asleep we will cover matters very simplistically:


In the beginning God created the cosmos from the verb. Simple, just think of what happens when we talk out loud, or think strongly on something, we move energy around, we create (actually transform is the correct word to use) something that starts a cause and effect process. In the case of God 'It' is still going on and on.


Just as man has always sought to make/find perpetual motion, God did it a long time ago.


The first race of entities were cellular and responded to light.


The second race was that of molecules responding to vibrations.


The third race was that of giants, crude and not very refined in form; remember that they had huge bodies and peanut size brains.


The fourth race was androgens (male/female) combinations and at this point the earth was in decay as the energy was in great use by the beings and an adjustment was needed. This was at the time of the mystical Lemuria (Atlantis followed right after), and were as they still had some of the deep esoteric knowledge that has always existed they were split in two for a better balance, both towards the earth and towards the cosmos.

It is said that they had been angelic beings floating around and wanted to play like the animal giants of the third race, so they took the physical form and then became trapped in that form as they enjoyed to much food and sex, thus their vibrational levels decreased and they became brain dead or unconscious, as to who they really are, sort of like us don't you think; 'angels without wings'.


Within the fifth race, us the Aryans, a group was sent and exists in order to help germinate the soul trapped within the being (Id). As the saying goes, 'our soul is bottled up, trapped inside our egos'. The egos evolved from the animal state (biological) and the soul from etheric energy (spiritual), just what angles are. In psychology we know that from the Id we develop the ego and superego. We are not trying to challenge 'the ego of the being', what most of us are referring to is the soul, but the being as an ego. That is to say we are who we are as humans (albeit asleep on the job) and thus we have an, 'ego' in the psychological term. What was never examined or talked of much was our soul (Id), it was left up to the religious system and we all know what they did with it.


Many say that the half-animal half-human figures we see from the Egyptians is that part of how we solidified our angelic souls and got trapped within.


Psychologically it proves itself bang on with the egos controlling us. Spiritually it is the battle of good and bad. But most of all, it is part of reality, if we care to investigate.


Please do not pre-judge the writing or yourself, but try to keep that open mind and your freedom of choice and follow along the path. It may take you somewhere you would like to really be and most of all it will give you some insight from an esoteric angle that you were probably never exposed to. This part is likely too much a headache for most, yet as it does contain truths that we have not wanted to look at, being too wrapped up in our suffering, we still need to feed it to our soul to help us grow and be free.

Magic or mysticism


Clairvoyance exists, clairaudience exists, etc. all latent within each person and every soul. But they are not really magic in the sense that with practice, we can all get to the point of doing it.


Magic is that thing which is unknown to us in our present state of mind. We have not yet seen, felt, nor understood it, so it must be magic. Therefore in the world of neuro-linguistics we will call all unknown stuff that happens, magic.


Just as the light bulb was being invented, it was magic for it was unknown, could not be done and thus not so. Even better and more to our times, computers with the 1 'on' and '0' off are what it is all about, and yet, it can help us heal a broken body, help us get to the moon, or communicate around the globe in milliseconds. Magic.


Mysticism would therefore probably be a better term, still a mystery and thus a mystic doing it. So all the inventors of whatever were in fact mystics, for they co-created something that no one else did. We did not say could, for many would say that ‘I could have done that’ once they see the invention, yet they did not. Why? Consciousness. Their co-creations were actually transformations of energy from one thing to another, based upon the obstacles they had to face to do what they 'believed' could be done.


Real magic starts inside ourselves when we realize that we are more than just a 'website' of egos and we start to treat ourselves, go(o)dly. Then we expand that over to our loved ones and they benefit from our magic.

And yes, when we start to really work on our goodliness and we are sincere in what we are doing, we start to receive the real gifts of magic, like clairvoyance etc and thus Godliness.


There are more things in this universe than man has ever dreamed of. Go and find some. We will love the journey, for it is what life is all about, and while we are on our way, bring God with us, for 'It' is just a manifestation of our inner being, conscious unconditional love with ultimate truth, cosmically.


Our soul knows something our egoic mind doesn’t.

We are all God


At least that is the essence of our soul, that part which lives on forever and ever, from one life to the next. Better still, we have Jesus the Christ inside of us and 'It' is just waiting to be re-born. Not as a Christian, but as a part of God manifested, here and now by our divine mother (the female aspect of all souls) who loves us the most and guided by our divine father (our seed of our soul's consciousness) who loves us the best, governs all of this.


God is love (unconditional). God is truth (ultimate, not manmade). God is the energy of it all (conscious). God is in us and wants us to be in 'It'. Thus God is life. And life is a journey of discovery. Not a journey of using and disposing of.


Besides if we plan 'It' right and help 'It' all out, we can get ourselves reborn (reincarnated) into the family we started with and made happy, wealthy and wise, consciously.


But alas, the egoic mind of freedom to choose would rather instant pleasure or avoid pain here and now (yet we still live the pain, mostly in silence). Some say that we maintain the inalienable right to keep our unhappiness and not give it up.


Thinking of tomorrow is too far and next life, ‘well how about making me happy (or whatever else) in this one, then I will change and grow’. Christmas comes in December and like the wheel of Samsura, it just keeps repeating and repeating itself. Just like giving us all those chances until we get it right. We need to change our way of thinking, we need a radical transformation, but when will we do it and not when is it going to be done for us.


So as a part of God, yes we, all together, form 'It' (God or Goddess), do we want to live unconsciously and treat ourselves as ‘evil’? Or, do we want to know real unconditional love, which goes hand in hand with the ultimate truth? We have the free will to choose, as we did before and as we always will, but somehow something is not working.


Just remember the following when we decide which way we want to go and how we choose to act.

Our soul is eternal


Big surprise. Not really. We were told that it is and will be awaken from the dead at judgment day of Armageddon to live happily ever after. Well actually it does not work that way, it goes from one cataclysm to the next when the totality of negative energy out balances the positive energy and we are reborn all the time based upon a number of factors you will learn about as you read on.


All we need to do to understand this is to be more conscious of what we are doing and how we are doing it. Like meeting someone for the first time, yet we know him or her. Of course we do, they are a soul mates of sorts and we were most likely with them during the night, setting up the encounter; or last life, or between lives to setup some fun stuff and also to collect dharma or pay karma. Life is fun even when it may not seem as such. Remember things are not always as they appear to be.


Don’t forget, just because our body and mind sleep, it is not a requirement for our soul to do so, after all it is just energy. Thus our nightly exit into the astral world.


Actually they seem to call it the spirit world where all our energies (souls) emanate from, and where we learn what parts of the play or movie on earth we are going to do next.


For sure Fate has a hand in it all, but we are still our own actor.  We have the free will to play it as we choose, and pay or collect as we go by raising our consciousness to enlightenment. Whichever we choose is going to be with us as our learning curve and this will lead to others and so on. Yes, from one life to the next. Until we get it right. If we don't choose consciously 'Fate' does.


What we have to get 'right' is inside of us and only 'you' can really know what it is. We just need to meditate on it and use our inner intuition and not our animal instinct to find all or part of our mission. Ours is writing this book, what is yours?


Sometimes we do not want to listen to ourselves and we ignore our intuition and go with the instinct. The instinct is usually kicking in due to some egoic situation that requires us to react and thus not act consciously. If we choose to go with the instinct and we should have used our intuition, then God (the love we have inside of us) will help us get back on course, one way or another. Ouch.


Our soul is eternal and it does not matter how hard we fight against things, it will just allow us to find out what we don’t like or want and we will be steered back onto the right path. We all choose most of what we are going through as our own learning curve to strengthen our consciousness and really know God. We do have debts to pay and receipts to collect that make this journey called life, so beautiful, with such great possibilities. Wow.

Love is unconditional, truthful and conscious


God is unconditional in all that 'It' is and does to and for us. We just need to copy or receive transference of 'It’s' way and virtues, instead of the ways of the egos of those around us.


When we learned to say 'I love you as a child', it meant that 'I am secure with you and you feed me and help me grow' (conscious love of a child). We are a unit that comes from the soul, an attachment of the Id that is still waiting to be germinated, understood so it can be lived.


While we are growing up and especially in puberty, we start to associate ‘I love you’ with' I want to have physical relations with you ' (or some other equally egoic reason) (unconscious).


However, did we first learn intimacy in relationships that will help us in our physical ones? Do we know how to be unconditional? How were we nurtured to it? Were we well parented in the art of 'Love/God'?


All the sages know and agree that the physical expression of love is the ultimate cosmic connection to God and should only be done, when intimacy is there and operational. Most of us just end up replacing sex for intimacy and never work on it. Thus all the relationship books, tapes and conferences are just as wide spread as the sex stuff is.


Thus there is no unconditional stuff; all has an attachment to something else. What happened to us in this process? It seems that with peace and free love we just kept going and going, forgetting about our intimacy. Forgetting about our souls and divinity. Bluntly put, we forgot about God. 'It' did not satisfy us.


Why? Just think of the word ego and control and intuitively we should get the picture. If we are in control then we do not need God in our relationships. If our ego tells us what to do (based upon our mixed up learned behavior patterns) then there is no need for us to think of God, that abstract thing. Sure 'It' maybe there when we need 'It' to be, but why think of 'It' when we are in control and don't need 'It'. Our ego wants control and has it, so our ego does not need 'It'.


But if we use the understanding that God is unconditional love, conscious and the ultimate truth of what is and is not real in life, and re-examine all of our relationships, we will be surprised at what we see. Most of us do not yet love ourselves consciously or unconditionally and as for the truth, we prefer to think that there are billions of them out there so we can do as we prefer, just like everyone else does. We can always do as we choose, remember freedom of choice.


Thus we can choose to let the ego control us away from God, thus leading us to being 'evil'. Remember 'lead us not into temptation', and we all though it was some devil outside of us they were talking about. But are we really 'evil'? We hear a lot of no's, but then why is it that on earth there is so much, with everyone saying it is the other guy? Who is this 'other guy'? We have all meet a lot of people and communicated with many more in our life, yet did we ever really meet this 'other guy'.

Egos / Sins (the Other Guy)


In everyday life most of us grew up thinking that it was good to have an ego that made us strong and who we are. Ego is the outward part of self-esteem, so it is the psychological neuro-linguistic use; in spirituality it is the unconscious part that does our sins. On the other hand we were 'learned' that sins were a no-no and should be avoided at all cost. So many of us were controlled by fear of us doing sins (having an ego), yet fear itself is one of the three captains of sins, so a sin used to control avoiding sins, what a contradiction, no wonder we are all mixed up with this.


What was confusing is that what people really meant to say was it was the soul that was needed to do this and that, but as science has a stronger hold on all of us, the word ego came in and took over, just as it really does in all situations when we are not conscious of what is going on.


Here is a manner of looking at it all from a practical point of view:


Fear is a captain ego which had its' base in fight or flight as a protection mechanism. Its' opposite or virtue is Courage. Desire is the second captain ego, which has been part of problems of mankind since forever. Its' virtue is Aspiration. The third captain is Badwill and its' virtue is Goodwill. These so called captains are the ones that control all the others and are the most prominent in the manner in which we have trouble with control by or towards others.


Anger we all know as a sin and its' virtue is Love. (Here is God trying to be).

Envy is countered by Altruism (all love for others). (Oh boy more God, or is it Gods?)

Pride of which too many people believe to be so good should be Humility. (Like JC).

Greed which comes from a low self-esteem and thus narcissistic is countered by Unselfishness. (Fodder for evil).

Lust the big one that we use as the fire burning within us is countered by Chastity. (Big problem!)

Gluttony as in all things too much is countered by Temperance (Slow down, ok?)

Sloth or laziness is countered by Diligence (Sped up, ok?)


But let's face it, who wants to know that we have sins in us, that we are sinners, let alone find out that our egos (the psychological defects of the human mind) are bad? Everybody should and here is why.

The process: karma, reincarnation and penitence from the rulers.


It is known and has been told for eons that the process is always karmic, until we wake up to the law of cause and effect (world of dualities) and transcend it.

Without getting to technical as you can investigate it all for yourself, the process is one of: as it is above so it is below. So whatever we contemplate happening with God and the energies above, is in fact within us here and now. How the injection of our soul into the physical body happens is a matter of metaphysics, which you can study at anytime from the writings of all the great masters. What is important here and now is to understand what is really going on.


God being un-manifested unconditional conscious truth and love seeks to be within all beings, to manifest. Given we have the seed of a soul within us it seeks to be germinated and thus manifested into God. We need to be consciously and unconditionally loving with pure truth in order to grow our soul, which is presently sleeping within our Id.


Being an experiment of the Sun (total loving light and energy, Sacred Absolute Solar system) we can transform all energy into whatever we so choose. As we have fallen into a deep sleep from lives gone by, we need to take stock of what is going on, wake up to ourselves, if we wish to be all we can be from the transformation and transmutation of the energies.


We erroneously believe that we are this and that. We make ourselves feel this and that. Yet we choose to ignore the totality of who we are and thus just live the wheel of Samsura and its' karmic process. We will repeat all events and happenings until we choose to wake up our soul, germinate God within us. We need to finesse the law of karma like in a card game; it can be done and has been done by many. There is an internal karmic court with judges where we can plead our case, if we so choose.


If we think that we have awaken to our Godliness, then just take a look around and we will see, how things really are. Who are 'they' that kill, maim and lie? We always say 'the others'. Yet our own slate is not so clean. So how can we go about saying it is the others when we are just as at fault? The egos. They will make us believe whatever they want in order for us to function (their way) in this world here and now. They keep us asleep with our fascinations of our material world, without any consciousness of our soul's growth. We give our freedom of choice over to them.


We see calamities and we cry out why God what is going on. Where are you? Help us! Yet we do not even help ourselves be Godly, so how can God live amongst us. Look all around us and at our self. Are we truly a Godly person, or is like most people saying I am good, I am loving, I am peaceful etc (actually I am ambivalent), it is the 'other guy'. But where is our Godliness. 'We', as in a loving God 'got' changed for the 'I' in the ego.


God being the Totality of loving conscious unconditional truthful energy, is all around us, to be transformed, transmuted or not. Think of it this way. We have maybe 10% of the world's population as so called spiritual leaders and maybe 10% of people trying to be consciously loving, unconditionally. So what is the other 80% doing? Making bombs. Making wars. Making money for its' own sake. Making lies to hide their fears and their other egos. Making whatever they can to be happy, which they really are not (as the ego will not allow them to give up the right to be unhappy), and so who is making, or germinating, or growing, or transforming God within themselves. Not many. So if we have 80% doing nothing, then we are surely going to end up with 80% none Godliness and thus 80% evil. We are in a world of duality and if God is there so is evil. If we choose to ignore one then the other is not and then we only exist for a life with no after-life, no heaven, no anything once we are gone.


Thus we substantiate our ego, selfishness, etc. and our right to be unhappy as it is all 'futile' anyway as there is no God. But it does not have to be, or does it?


When we are born we are given our 'Fate and Destiny' to play out based upon previous lives and all of our actions. We are placed with egos/sins that tempt us into whatever we must overcome. We must pay penitence for all our egos/sins just as we receive good things for all our virtues we develop. 'Fate' demands that we wake up or repeat the actions all over again, the next time a lot harder. Our egos make sure of that for they are what the system, cosmos, hierarchies or whatever you want to call it, use to extract the penitence.


So unless we wakeup, germinate God from within, be that totally conscious loving person with unconditional pure truth (no lies at all), then we will just create a harder cycle for the next life, if there is one. As we revolve around the wheel of Samsura, and do not wake our soul up, we end up condemning ourselves to the abyss. Some call it 'crispy critter land'. This happens at the time of a cataclysm that we have heard of before, just look into the evolution of our earth and we will see it all.


Some do not care or choose not to believe, and yet call themselves loving and thus think of themselves as Godly. How can they be when they will not germinate the soul and awaken to God, love and truth. We are all different characters on the path of life, and we have the free will to follow our egos or our soul. As our soul is bottled up inside, asleep, as it has been for many lives, how can we really be anything but egos and thus our sins? They are one and the same.


We are in need of looking at our character weaknesses and changing them into strengths, just like changing our egos/sins into virtues. The personality characteristics are the same as the ego/sins and virtues. We can be a positive charge or a negative one. We all have free will, but for most that was handed over, sold out to, the one that pays us our asking price.


Penitence is extracted by the process, which we live in and it must be paid, consciously or unconsciously. One leads to freedom and enlightenment the other to allowing the egos the control and thus the abyss. Those who chastise us lovingly are trying to help us grow, awaken and germinate the soul. Those who chastise us for control do so for the egoic selfishness (narcissism) that most of us are actually living.


Narcissism is part of the psychological process whereby we realize that there is some power stronger than us and grow into it, thus transcending the narcissism (self-love). If a problem occurs at that infantile stage then we will develop a degree of narcissistic behavior. This is a disorder of low self-esteem (which attaches itself with greed to satisfy its wants). So in order to offset this weakness we create a larger 'self' and pump it up whichever way our egos can, justifying in a way that we are omnipotent and therefore raising the question, where is God; I am God.


The seed is still asleep in our Id as it is not yet awaken. As we grow and find ways to feed our narcissistic self-centeredness wants, boosting our self-esteem, we end up truncating the seed, the soul within and appeasing ourselves (egos) in whatever manner we can. It becomes a total lack of consciousness and we perpetuate the evil that narcissism is, pride, lust, gluttony, envy and any other part the ego can get us to swallow, that is to live, in order to pay penitence or retribution for unjust deeds and actions. So the ego is good for those who choose to stay asleep and pay penitence unconsciously.


However, as we can see this takes us into an endless loop, whereby we are presented with a situation of penitence and instead of being conscious to it, we react with another ego and this creates another 'karma' to pay, and so on and so on.

Control your egos or be controlled by them or those of others.


Our spirit (soul's Id) enters the fetus in the last months of pregnancy and comes and goes at will. This is to allow the connection between the bio-psychological brain of the fetus and our eternal spirit to create our soul. Something strange but think on it and intuitively you will see what is happening here.


Until we are about 5-6 years old our spirit comes and goes as our body sleeps. This sets the pattern for our life of astral travel, which helps us grow and understand. This is the time when children are learning psychological traits and yet are the most attuned to the realities of the world. This is when they see things that we do not, yet we did at their age but forgot it all.


Unfortunately most children, due to cultural and parental habits, are exposed to a great deal of problematic behavior situations. The spirit was cognizant of it all, and tried, and is still trying to help to fix it, to get us to wake up to it all. What a learning process; undo the bad and keep the good. So as we grow from one stage to the next, we bring along our childhood psychological problems, learn some more new ones and , thank Fate, fix some of the old ones.


Our challenge on the journey is who or what is in control, with the first answer as a child being, the goodly instinct, a virtue of our spirit/soul combination. Later we grow into our egos, good and bad, learned from caregivers and society. Eventually we try to spread our wings and be ourselves. The question then becomes 'who are we'?


In the psychological sense, we are our 'unknown Id' that chaos of energy that created an ego from an error in the 'narcissistic' process and then ended up somewhere in the super-ego.


The super-ego is that part which is really the subconscious of ourselves that has a set of morals and beliefs spoon fed to us by our caregivers and society, yet was never tested, experienced by us as 'real or ultimate truth'; but that we had to accept as fact in order to survive in this egoic world. Within the sub-conscious space we will also find the energies of all our childhood traumas, abuses, crisis and things that have yet to be resolved, but that were buried in order to cope, to survive. As are Id was not parented, we became our ego, which was parented by erroneously learned behavior patterns.  


As we move into early adulthood and sexuality, we start a family not even knowing if we are ready (nurtured) or capable (consciously). And given the state of all of our societies it is apparent that we were not. But why?


Transference is the simplest way to teach and learn. So the older transfer their psychological songs (egos and learned behavior patterns) to the younger. Now this is not so bad if the old teaching us are conscious, non-evil (that is working towards God not away from) or they had a good upbringing themselves. 'Introjections' is the term Freud coined for this transference in that it is injected into the ego and super-ego of the child.


More often than not, what happened in our male dominant society, was that seeing how men controlled women and how women accommodated men, (giving in and just allowing things to continue due to fear etc), the child while growing picked up the same patterns as the parents. In other words, the egos of the parents transferred (were injected) into and became those of the child, through obedience and fear, and of course guilt, which was itself strengthened by most of the religious or cultural systems around.


So to answer the question; 'who or what is in charge', we need only look at the psychological egos and/or religious sins within ourselves, to see that it is they, and not really our soul that is in control. This answers in part the problem of the issue of control for so many women as it is the men that are doing the controlling in one form or another.


If we are conscious of these facts, if we can see a little past our egos, where the essence of our soul tries to shine through (tap into the Id), then we can see what is really going on. For it is only being conscious of cause and effect that we can start to awaken to 'what and why' things happen the way they do. It does cause a little bit of suffering to be digging around inside our psyche and seeing the truth of ourselves, but then again most of us have been suffering inside, in one way or another most of our lives. It is always the ego and not the soul that suffers, and remember that the ego does not want to relinquish its' right to be unhappy.


This is how our mid-life crisis comes to be and how the change of life at 50 sends so many of us for a loop, only to finish at retirement with a lot of unresolved issues. If we think that there were some crabby grandparents back when, just wait until the boomers hit old age.


Let’s face it, we have all had or still have feelings of impotence and seek an expression by controlling something, even our sicknesses can be traced to it. So why let anything that is not love (unconditional, truthful, conscious and Godly) control us? Why not live, that which we know intuitively inside ourselves who we really are, but have not been able to express? Why not live that which we have always felt yet seldom understood? We have been doing things the same way for so long that it is just repetitive actions with no thought or consciousness in it. Try another way, at least to see if it is better. Or as they say 'are we waiting until it hurts enough'?


We were not really taught by freedom of thought but more by control on what and how to act. Thus propagating the egos from one generation to the next. So, we already know whom or what is in control, it is just under disguise, which is actually under our consciousness, thus unconscious to us. We have to find ourselves and work on being all that we can be, for ourselves first, God/Love second and then humanity.


We are first, as we have the choice or not to follow Love and God to the highest points, that is if we decide that we are worth Loving. But do we really love ourselves enough, or are we fearful enough to give in, give up and just live egoically?

Why the system told us so many lies


If we go back to cultural anthropology, we will see how translations were done and how we evolved from then to now. However, the most amazing parts are the errors that were done. Honest or narcissistic, you decide. Words are words and can be miss-used, translated or just mixed up, as we have seen in the use of neuro-linguistics. Nonetheless when we use our intuition and inner guide(s) we can start to piece together the flow of information. We can start to better understand who did what and why. Thus we see either the ambivalence, or the narcissism at work.


They say that knowledge is power and that ultimate knowledge is ultimate power. The problem that is created here is 'what will we do with it'. Can it be shared, or can it be held onto like crazy glue. With sharing, we start to unravel the falsehoods left by the others and what the underlying truth is. With holding on to it, we end up losing it, as all knowledge is to be shared.


They told us JC was born on Dec 15th. Just like all the messiahs. They told us the angel Gabriel came unto Mary and she had the virgin birth. Gabriel was the head of the elders who’s custom it was to impregnate adult unmarried women, for their ‘secret groups’ needs.


They told us that we needed an intercessor between God and us. So they could control us easier.


They told us we could buy our way out of hell to feed their narcissistic wants and the fear of damnation, which only exists on earth anyway.


They told us JC arose from the dead. Read up on this in any secret society process and you will see what and where the rebirth came from. Long before JC and Moses it was a spiritual ritual process.


They told us that reincarnation did not exist, as the Pope’s wife did not want to pay the karmic debt for her adulterous lifestyle, so they removed it even after the council of Nicosia proclaimed it in the bible. What to believe?


The fighting between cultures has been going on since the time of the caveman and while we have evolved, we have involved (regressed) in terms of our spiritual nature to the present age of decay, known mostly as ambivalence, remember that it is not us it is always 'the other guy'.


Like it or not, here we are.


But, with all the ambivalence going on, who really cares. We do. There so much BS since ancient times, and unless we fix it, one way or another, we are sealing our grandchildren's 'Fate' and ours, to the wheel of Samsura.

Jesus Christ Historical and Metaphysical


So, as the story goes (mostly from the Masonic and other such groups) JC was born into the top ranking family of his day and was privileged to access many of the ancient mysteries since forgotten. Like the arc of covenant and other ancient texts explaining things that Buddha had access to as well as many others before and since.


As the eldest son (although some say he was a twin, and the other one was crucified) he was heir to a very powerful position. However, having raised his consciousness to the ultimate truth, and knowing God as conscious unconditional love, he was not going to accept the propagation of falsehoods that would continue to allow the less fortunate to be controlled.


With freedom in mind he set out to right the wrongs and share the gnosis of being one with God, as is everyone’s right. In essence, to die for our sins, no matter what they are, but he did not say to us that we should keep on sinning, as many believe, from Monday to Saturday.


Reading the various books on this subject will give us much clearer insight into all the BS that the system has handed down to us since then, including ‘Who Wrote the Bible’ and what they left out and why.  How Mary was impregnated by one of the elders called Gabriel and how the resurrection worked for all concerned.


When all the narcissists are fed, nobody complains, but truth seekers never stop seeking. (This is actually part of our karmic rebalancing), but they usually somehow end up dead. Then again we all will one day, so that we can be reborn again and again.


We can see how politically corrupt it was in those days, just like today. But moreover, it ties together all the loose ends of the period and gives us back our right to ask questions, and be one with God, without laws or dogmas to control us. Read the Ancient Dead Sea Scrolls and the Nag Hammed papers to see what JC really said to the disciples and why it has been kept away from us.


Conspiracy theory?  Why not? It is of an advantage to the pure narcissist of the day, and best of all, we have been living that part of the movie for 2000 years.


He did have all the metaphysical aspects, but even these where diverted to underground Gnostic lineage in order to protect the truth and convey it from generation to generation. The bad guys in those days had an easier time to wipe out their targets. Today given how things are, who is going to believe any of it anyways.


We know he studied in Alexandria Egypt the site of the best libraries that the world had to offer then.


We know that the books were mostly in Greek, which was the language of government and religion at that time; too bad they were all burnt.


More important, we learned that he was in India and the east learning all the esoteric things it has to offer.


Thus, the metaphysical part comes into the picture. He literally did become one with God, for he attained the Gnosis of how all things on earth and in heaven work and thus ascended to the levels of energy that only a true master/blessed one can.


Remember, it is inside of us all as the Id, asleep, unknown yet there, just like magic. He and the others (masters) now reside in Agartha/Shambhala, which is known as the 'cosmic mirror' beyond time and thought.


It just is.


He was born on the same day that all the great messiahs before and since have been born; Dec 25th, which is chosen day for a multitude of reasons and from this he knew that all of us could touch the divine as much as possible, given the merits of our heart.


He managed to spread the word to those who would hear, and thus propagate the ultimate truth and conscious unconditional love. God.


Much was written in parables as he tried to circumvent the system that was 'out to get them', yet many of his and other groups sacred teachings still exist. But, sadly as he said 'be like the money changers and learn to take the good from the bad', so much is used in a corrupt manner. Thank you, that you have intuition and a soul to separate the wheat from the chaff.


Scholars and the like may not want to agree on many of these facets, yet each knows the gnosis of it all and has an interest that it goes their way and not some other. Yet the truth is what it is and not what man made it to be, or molded to what he wants. That is self-interest and thus narcissistic. Many have been privy to a lot of those secrets and yet most have not wanted to share it, for they could have competition in their realm of narcissistic propagation and control.


Why would anyone want to hide the arc of covenant that is said to contain a great type of thermal energy source and the ways for building the pyramids, cathedrals and a host of other mathematical processes?


Many times it has been said that ‘They do not tell us the truth of this or that for our own good and some to protect us as we are not ready’. Not ready for what, we are all in the same movie and trying to listen to the director (the Boss) but can’t hear him as we have our minds full of BS, and really don’t know which way is up with all the narcissists yelling go this way or that way.


We are all humans, living the same experiences of life on earth, and have a right to know the gnosis of it all, if we are interested and work to it. Some of us need to know, as our soul cannot be made quite by anything but the ultimate truth. They just want us to be the players in their movie and do not like it when we try to direct.


God gave you freedom of choice, use it or lose yourself, your energy, to the one you submit to, for a penny or for an awakened conscious.


JC both historical and metaphysical left us many great things, but the most cherished would be that we need no one between God and us for we have God within, waiting to be germinated, grown and lived. And God will wait and wait and wait and wait until we act first (not react, which is from one ego or the other) and ask for help, for God helps those who help themselves. Follow the path of JC and the other prophets and you will find God, yourself. After all it is the greatest story ever told and it is a Love story at that.


The metaphysical part is more obscure, especially in the west, as we do not have the same openness to intuition and mysticism as they do elsewhere. Nonetheless it can be investigated and understood with belief and faith, in ourselves first and then in God. For as we start to fully love ourselves unconditionally and truthfully, we start to raise our awareness (consciousness) and be all we can be. We can then start to undo the egoic entanglement in our minds and thereby live as that unconditional love we all are.


When we give all to God before ourselves (which by the way when it says ‘have no other Gods before me’ means that Godly part of us and not someone outside of us that many try to make us believe) we are not helping ourselves but just asking to be helped. This is a type of process of narcissism in which we center on our problem and then on our pain without taking a look at our self first and saying, 'let me get to the bottom of me' so 'I know myself and thus a part of God'.


If we know 'It' in us, then we can see 'It' in others. If we know 'It' in us, then we can see when 'It' is not being lived in us or in others. Just like child development, when we copy those who nurture us or at least train us and grow us for the first 6 odd years. Baby steps at first and like in the movie ‘What about Bob?’ we will be on the road to being all that we can be. Better for us and better for all those around us.


As Matsuo Basho said ‘Seek not to follow in the footsteps of men of old; seek what they sought’. Freedom of choice as it was.

What the spirit world is like and why we are doing all of this.


The book ‘Journey of the Soul’ talks of life between lives. We know that most people have enough trouble living in this one and are not interested in what was before or what is in another dimension. However, ignorance is what keeps us slaves to our egos, and thus away from being our inner Godliness. Intelligence is the pursuit of goals regardless of the obstacles before us.


The soul chooses what course it wants to learn, what it needs to learn, in order to be all that it can be, all that it was created to be. We can be simple egos bouncing around at the will of Fate, or we can awaken to ourselves and start to be all that it is possible to be in this lifetime and future ones. What is started in one lifetime is never lost and can be regained, as is the case, to help in other ones.


While we sleep at night, our soul is in the other dimensions trying to figure out new, better, different ways to wake us up and to stop the egos from controlling us. To literally stop us from being evil, no matter to what degree we are. We have the freedom to choose, or not, what we will do. Fate is always there resting as well, until we awaken, and then it is back into temptation via the egos.


We need to awaken our conscious, and thus enlighten ourselves to a point that we are welcomed back to the inner mysteries of life and share more and more with the energies all around us, as co-creators of what we can and do want to live.


God is total truth, unconditional, conscious love; don’t we think that it is time we started to act a little more like our real being?


It seems that we are bound to suffer some way or another, why not make it conscious, then at least we will know why we are, unlike now, when we do most of it in silence for fear of the unknown. We have not yet understood ourselves and much less our mates. We have just repeated a pattern that was injected into us by the caregivers, by society and now we are all alone, or so we think. So off we go and get a mate to play in our movie of life, or ride our roller coaster as it were.


The only thing is that no one really told us about the 'birds and the bees' from a loving point of view, instead of the physical one that at least some of us got. No one ever mentioned that with God as Love, then anything that is physical Love should have God in the picture. To many of us it would be uncomfortable to have, to think that someone is watching.


Alas, do we not think that God knows and sees all of our truths, or is it that we do not want think and know that God knows and is watching? When anything in life does not contain God, we can all count on one thing, and that is that Fate is there instead of God. This has been going on since our 'angelic fall' and still needs to be understood if we are going to fix all that which is broken.

Love then now and it’s reference to Sex


In those days when women were chattel, as man got stronger, women became more insecure, for man used his strength, his force and his narcissism on her, which she did not have to the same degree; so she submitted to and accommodated him. Yet JC, as did all the other messiahs, always spoke out frankly that females have all the same rights and possibilities as the males. No more, no less.


In fact let us throw in a little extra for the ladies; men cannot attain dissolution of the egos without the female. Why? Ask the ladies and they will most likely know why and never had the ‘chutzpa’ to tell us. Like the unconditional love that they are more than us, they are waiting for their time and season. We will know.


So how much could there have been of unconditional conscious love back then, when the male viewed the female as an object, much like today in most parts of the world? Not a lot. So love in those days was for sex (power) and security, as it is today. When we take a closer look at it, we realize that what most men want sex for is what it gives them, power over the woman and that sexual orgasm that lasts about so many seconds (the average man’s attention span: as we are writing this book we can take a liberty here and there to get the point across, if your ego gets upset ask it why? And while you are at it, make sure it gets mad, maybe you will do something constructive about it).


This unfortunately is the self-interest process known as narcissism. 


Then the female wanting intimacy (or a facsimile of it like closeness to start) that she most likely did not receive growing up  which the mate usually gives her for the sex, submits to or accommodates him in the process. Unfortunately this is known mostly as ambivalence on her part, and thus just another form of narcissism. While often done by the female for security reasons, it is also a latent manner of control over the male. Think about it and we are sure that we can see the causes and effects that are at work here. Remember that things are not always as they appear to be, as there is always some underlying cause and effect, which usually goes way back to childhood and is of our wounded inner child.


So in the olden days as now, love really means sex in one form or another. For how can someone truly love another if they do not consciously love themselves (without the narcissism), if they were fed a 'process' and are not living their own Godliness? How can they be Godly (unconditionally loving) to another? We may have sex calling it love and yet it is for our self-interest and not for a divineness from within, thus for a Godly reason. Since antiquity man has talked of divine love and tantric sex. Yet here in the west we think divine is our power and tantric is something over there, with the 'other guy' or in the very least, weird.

If you read the book ‘Sex in History’ by Tannahill you will get a clear picture on how we evolved all of this.

Sex: Tantric (or how to transmute our energy, if we want to)


We are not ones to be crude, but to get a point across allow us this one: as humans we are literally screwing our brains out.




We all know basic chemistry and evolution, which is to say that at least we understand transformation of one type of energy to another type. Just as a log burns to create heat so does the nutrients we intake transform to create all the physical parts that we need to live and be, our own inner energy.


It has been written of over and over that passion is the animal nature of man and has been related to the Satan, the devil. The part that they are actually talking of is that which we allow to take over us instinctually and not consciously. Our egos.


So each time that we have an orgasm (expulsion of energy out of our body) we are literally reducing our state of consciousness. In psychology the biological process has been studied, measured, and they know that it is a manner of riding us of our aggression. Why?


Think of a battery that is fully charged and functioning normally, then start to overcharge it with impulses (in our case all the sounds, sights, and touches of more than romantic/erotic nature) and it will over heat and blow up. The pressure build up prior to blowing up is at that point uncontrolled, just as we did not consciously want it to blow up, we just did not pay attention to it.


Now bring together a concept of our aggressive world and the current state of decline to decadence and we have a problem. If an orgasm can curb aggression then why are we so aggressive? Simple. We are addicts. Sex is just like a drug we need more and more to attain the same high or result. Worst, as we get older, use to such and such a method or stimulant, we need to seek new ways to attain the same old want, for that is all it is, a want, not a goal/journey like life, not a method of communication like intimacy, but just as many have said, rutting.


So then how does the brain get affected by all of this? By lack of the strongest and most powerful energy in the cosmos feeding it. We just expel it and instead of feeding our consciousness, our soul, our love, our virtues, we feed our egos. Many have told us that too much 'passion' was evil, and that is precisely what we are feeding them. The 'passion' in most cases is just egos of lust, desire, pride and we imagine the others as well, for they are all interconnected somehow, somewhere, in our psyche.


So what should we do, stop-making love, many would ask out of narcissistic frustration in condescending attitudes. Thus the ego is getting hyper and not wanting to believe what it is reading, hearing or thinking. Lets get it straight, most of us are not making love, but are in fact having sex, or just rutting. Making love is something divine and something that requires, intimacy, nurturing, caring, tenderness and most of all communication. Consciously.


So what have we been doing all these years? Be honest and tell the truth! Don't forget, we were all injected with the egos of those who cared over us, and thus if they did not have it within them and showed us, then we had to find out all about nurturing intimacy ourselves.


So what can we really do to stop the tide from drowning us? Well how about by stopping what we have been doing up to now, re-examine the meaning behind it all and start to communicate with our mate. We will be surprised at what we find. Most of us have the same issues, same egos and thus keep the same things hidden or buried for fear or shame of guilt, ridicule and pride.


Transmutation is a word that has been around for eons, and simply put means the process of changing willfully something into something else. It has been used in the context of our inner energy in esoteric writings for the practice of moving our energy from our genitals (think of our inner hormones and how they are made and act) consciously up to our head. Sort of like giving ourselves hot flashes of the erotic kind. This transmutation has little to do with erotic stuff, but is simply the opening of your various energy canals by conscious breathing and focus, as acupuncture does with the chi in the body.


There are books and books written on this process and many talk of the fantastic benefits it brings. Remember that 'truth can start to heal all wounds and Love does heal all wounds'. Yet there are also dangers that lurk behind as well. They are called our egos. 


If we undertake to work in this process with our mate, we need to understand that if we start to play with it 'as a new toy', a new way to reach greater orgasms etc. then we can be assured that we will get burnt. We know that our soul wants to get out from under the egos, but it is so bottled up, that it needs a super charged power, sexual energy to be freed. But if we are just doing it for fun or joy and not really trying to raise our or our mate’s consciousness, then all we are really doing is feeding our egos, in mega doses that can injure and in some cases kill.


Lust is the first in line and all the other egos following in line for their morsel of it as well. Remember who is controlling whom? So what happens? The same as before only worse in that we are now looking at an overfed, hungrier ego that is starting to think it is God, invincible, all-powerful and dominant over the mate. Thus, if both are not on this path, it is most assured that one will be even more dominant over the other.  The battery at some point will explode and injure, perhaps profoundly just as some types of child abuse and trauma had already done to one or the other, so buyer beware.


On the other hand, if we are willing to communicate, to create intimacy, nurturing where only egos once ruled, then we have a chance to really raise our consciousness and be all we can be, for ourselves, for God and for others. Remember that God is unconditional love and ultimate truth, consciously. And, that is what we will be creating within our couple, a Godly union of two energies, just as the cosmos is.


But please let us not fool ourselves; beware of the ego, the narcissism. We know that in order to attain this type of consciousness raising we need to withhold the orgasm. Yes we did say withhold it. More to the point, we need to be transmuting it from the genitals to the brain. Just as we fed our egos up to now with the expulsions, we need to transmute the energy up to our brain. Some maybe shocked to hear of this or see it written, but just look at it as magic, we did not know it before and now we do.


 And, if we are in doubt of this or want more concrete data to satisfy ourselves, then all we need do is research it from the Buddhists, the Taoist and the Gnostics. They all knew and know of this part of the enlightenment process and just how hard it is. But, they also know that the benefits are far greater than the work to getting it right. Besides, if we ask our mate and they are truthful, they will most likely admit that many a time they did not have an orgasm, but felt rested. Try it and see if you happen to notice a difference thereafter, just one try is all that is needed. Why not try it first thing in the morning before starting the day when the energies are all waking up and you are sure to find the day, exhilarating.


Sounds difficult. It all depends on how strong our egos are and how hard we are willing to try. Let’s face it, we have been doing as we have been doing up to now, and it is not making or getting any better. Something is wrong. Try investigating and analyzing it and then we can decide for ourselves what it really is. If anything we are sure it will bring a lot more harmony and joy back into our lives, not to mention a lot of happier relationships.

Waking up is easier than we think


Thanks to God and our soul we have all the tools at hand, we just need to use them. We can choose what and how we want to do it, but we need to ‘just do it’.  Look at the things that we do and then see how it would be if ‘conscious unconditional truth and love’ were doing it. Any differences? We have the choice to see or not to see. If we ask for help, divine help at this point, then we are sure that we will get it.


Most of us think that waking up means pain, torture and long hours of this and that. What we forget, is that in our last life, we already attained a certain level that we may or not be awake to at this point in this life. We will know once we wake up to ourselves. Besides, with all the pain we have and do go through, why not take a holiday from our egos and find our soul.


Most of all, all the energy that is inside of us needs us to wake up; we are guided by that energy to do it. If we so choose we can listen to our inner voice of intuition or ignore it and maintain our right to be unhappy. Thus the eternal question, why stay asleep in the false images of life, when with truth and beauty we can wake up. Each experience of life is a chance to grow and to know ourselves, higher and higher.


Most people have heard of meditation and all the benefits that it brings to the body and the soul. Yet most people are too busy to do it, so they get weaker and older before their time and become lethargic or ambivalent towards it all, saying ‘I just want to be happy and live a good life’. The question they forget to ask is, ‘how?


Yet all the while the ego is saying that we are living a good life and that we have the right to be unhappy. Remember that whatever we think in our egoic mind will happen unless we awaken our consciousness and understand what the challenges are that we are facing.


If we are not happy now, what are we? When will we be happy? When we get this or that? When our narcissism is really satisfied? (Which it can never be, which is a part of the paradox of the narcissist). Thus we would like to be more evil than we really are in order to be happy. Ironic isn’t it, we want to be more like the infamous Satan and not like God who is love and yet which is what we keep telling ourselves that we do, Love. But how can we love if we do not really know it? Who did or did not teach us it all through our life and lives? Did we ever really believe anything of God/Love to know that it is inside of us. More interesting, what does ambivalence have to do with love, life, God and evil or at least the lesser twin, narcissism or consciousness?

Evil and Narcissism


First of all let us use the word evil to mean ‘simply that, which moves away from or is not actively moving towards or acting Godly’. Gods means unconditional conscious love. Added in is always ultimate truth, our soul's and not the egos. Of course there is the whole cosmology of our souls (which you can glimpse at in 'Karmic Balancing'), if you want to read about it check out 'Pista Sophia' by Samael Aun Weor, father of modern Gnosticism.


We learned from our elders; they learned from theirs and given that man is more apt than not to lie for gain, it is reasonable to accept that non-Godly actions (lies etc) are done in the name of gain, one type or another. So with this inner constructed self-interest comes self-centeredness, which is also known as narcissism (which is itself a disorder of 'self-esteem'). It is at the bases of all things evil and egoic, from both the psychological level and the spiritual point of view.


When we grow up under the control of others, they can either form us into goodly people, or we can be exposed to their own egos that will in fact turn us into not so goodly people, into acts of self-interest, self-centeredness and ultimately narcissistic evil.


Just as from olden times, man has manipulated the truth of most things, thereby creating a narcissistic process that was in fact handed down from generation to generation. Some cultural groups and some religious ones are better at it than others, but suffice to say that they are all affected, except the ones that are not. (JC and the like).


 Since this self interest and self centeredness really got out of proportion in the peace and love era, when all we did was for instance gratification and for the continuation of our consumer society, we created the ultimate disposable, ‘relationships’. Not to say that that had not been in existence before, it is just that we popularized it, as we have a so many things, like narcissism. Think of it, we propagated evil ourselves, just as those before us. Unconsciously, perhaps in some cases, but in most, just a cause and effect of the egoic wants, forgetting the soulful needs.


Within our family units, we find that this is most prevalent when we get into situations that we refuse to see or admit, as those that may have nurtured us cannot be evil or do evil things, therefore, how can we be if we are doing just as they did and are still doing; just as they taught us. We choose to see only what we (the ego) want to see, and depending on which ego is looking at it, what we don’t want.


Thus, self-centeredness is back at play and teaching us gratification from egoic thoughts. So we merrily go along feeding our narcissism (there is a whole story in itself of this process worth understanding) and literally being evil. Supported by like people of like minds (the ones that taught us and put all the stuff that is in our heads, in our head) we believe that we are strong (actually we gave our strength and freedom to the leader who has the strongest control or narcissism over us) and all that we do is right.


If we should encounter someone who is conscious and questions what we do and why we do it, we feel that they are not part of our family or group and thus they are wrong with their questions. Don’t forget at this point if we were to accept their consciousness, then we would have to question ours and it may mean that they are right and that we have been living a lie (albeit a family taught one) all along. So by rejecting them it is easier to stay unconscious and not face reality, the ultimate truth, and thus Fate keeps on extracting its' penitence.


Just as it goes inside of us, so it goes around us. The business world is a reflection of our personal lives. Problems at home, problems at work. Bad relationship at home, bad ones at work. Lies at home and you can be sure lies at work. So the wheel of Samsura takes us around and around. Until we wake up to our divine self, no one knows when it will stop.


Thank God that our spirit and Fate are always there to guide us into being stronger and more awake, like it or not. Did you ever wonder why there is so much substance abuse? It has to do with living reality without God. Like it or not, let’s face it; while we were brought up with ‘I love you’, there was always some condition attached to it. 'If you do this or that, if you say this or that, if you give me what I want or if I want what you give'.


So in reality we say I love you but it is without God and just a type of abuse to our soul. It is very rare to see an ‘I love you’ for you and your Godliness, for the respect of you being who you are and not what your egos try to make as an image. That is the way we need to love life, beauty and thus ourselves. That is to say we need to be unconditional, conscious and truthful.


Narcissism does not like this. It cannot control that. Therefore it rejects all that comes to it and that will not feed it on its' own basis. So the wheel of Samsura goes around and around. We are living the lies and thus the evil taught to us and we choose not to wake up to it. What will our generation do when they retire, once they have more time to really think? Try peace and love again. That would be fun instant gratification, but will surely have a lot of problems with it, medical and psychological. So, given our upbringing, our lack of real love, and our move away from Godliness, what can we do?


Well firstly, don’t sweat the small stuff, as we will sooner or later learn it all (Fate knows how to extract penitence and teach us). Our spirit will make sure of that. Thank God.


Secondly, we need to revisit ourselves and all that we have done, and see if we can wake up to our own causes and effects, we all have them and all that is required is belief that we can do it.


But most of all we need to learn to love ourselves, in the divine way we were meant to. It is all up to us to choose what we want to know and see what we don’t. Until this happens, until we really do care for ourselves and thus for God and others, we cannot be free and happy with who we are. Because quite frankly we are not who we are, but who we were taught to be, just as an animal was taught so were we. Egos, mostly of the instinctive nature, but nonetheless what we are and how we act.


So in fact we are no one, not a soul, not a real human being that has a soul, knows Love and thus God. So, where do we want to go today? Nowhere that causes problems, so let us just forget it or brush it off.



As a modern day propagator of evil, we see ambivalence just about everywhere, and we have all been affected by it and worst have fed into it. Just look at the home life we grew up in and that we formed our egos around. It was when we should have done well and did bad, without any guilt or remorse over it. It was when we saw others doing not good things and did not point it out, without at least keeping evil via narcissism in check. We have all been a party to both of those situations, lamenting that there is nothing we can do about it. Just as we lament, that there is nothing we can do about repeating all the patterns that we were taught, and that we have blindly kept as we were told to do. We were made to believe that what we were stuffed with, spoon-fed with, was alright and not to argue about it.


Whatever happened to free will ours and that of those around us?


Actually we do know what happened, we gave up our free will to the one that was stronger narcissistically than we were/are. It was/is probably some family member, like a spouse or a parent, and as such the wheel of Samsura keeps turning and turning. Thus we fed into narcissism, which must be fed, by being ambivalent, just to survive. Ambivalence today creates more harm than a lot of the nuclear weapons, in as much as; it is one of the main problems of us all. To one degree or another.  Such as it does come in degrees from some little white lie to some out and out fraud.


So why is it there and why does it persist? Three little letters will answer it very nicely and directly. S E X. We all know how to spell; we all know what is meant. Think of all the energy we expulsed from our body and did not use for conception, nor for transmutation of consciousness. Why? Instant gratification. So we became tired and lethargic because we achieved that which we (our egos) were seeking, an orgasm (actually from the biological standpoint we just made ourselves tired physically).


That lasts for how long? Good thing we have freedom of choice to do that, just like the animals are doing, rutting.


As it has been said, we all have sex because ‘I love you’ means just that, I want to have sex with you, or in the least if you stay around because I say it, then I will have that chance and thus we go on rutting just as the animals do. Just as the animals don't 'talk' during the act it is a known fact that most couples do not either.


Yet that is one of the main things that separates us from the animal kingdom and brings God into the bedroom. As we hear those protest to this, we also now that without that Love in us God is not about to make an appearance, just because we use words, actions always speak louder than words and that is were we find the vibrations that are needed in order to hear properly.


Yet those conscious of their ambivalence come to find that making love with God as the union of the two, after communicating with their mate is what unconditional love, consciousness and truth is all about. They do not allow the ego to take over too much, or in some cases at all. They try their best to be the best they can be and awaken as much as possible to who they are and what they are. They do not fool themselves into false thinking, they just try their Godly best to be, real unconditional conscious love, making things better for themselves and all of those around them. They try and live life with as much truth as possible so that they do not have to maintain ambivalence in their life and thus propagate the evil within. They really do live life to its' fullest potential, or at least they try as hard as they know how. That is what love is all about, trying to the best of our abilities and knowledge. And don't forget that just as with our justice system, ignorance of the laws it not an excuse. 


So where do we go from here?


We have the freedom to choose that which we want, that which we decide. When it is the ego of this or that deciding what we do then we can at least thank God that our spirit will always get us back on the right track ,one way or another. The only thing is that it is the hard way, for it is not voluntary suffering as is growing up and having a disciplinary person help you be all that you can be, for and of yourself (the chastisement in nurturing); then they try and help you realize that you to can make a difference to the love of life, through God. Which simply means being unconditional conscious love, truthfully. Most of this stems from our inner psychological song that has been played over and over in our head, as we have yet to re-write it.


As JC said, 'be like that money changer and keep the good but reject the bad'. So we have to do the same thing we all the spoon-fed or stuffed into us reactions to actions that we learned by rote but never examined the experience ourselves to know if it is a real truth. We learned a lot by trial and error of what was real bad, but very little on what was a little bad and next to nothing on what was real good.


Psychology as started by Freud mapped out the thinking process and the effects that all things had on us, sort of like the matrix of our mind. We are helping to map out the method of repair from the weaknesses to the strengths, by being consciousness of ourselves, our Id, and by dissolving the egos into virtues. Spirituality is just the continuation of psychology, with God in the picture. That is to say, why we are…Love, unconditional, conscious and truthful. Without God in the picture, is when we made ourselves God, as Freud points out in the 'narcissistic stage'.


The term psycho-spiritual very well describes the path that we are on, learning to see the entanglement of our egos into our Id.

Evil and how it is really viewed with narcissism and ambivalence


What a nasty little word, and funny enough it is live spelled backwards. So we deduct that if we are not living life consciously then we are living evil, which sadly enough seems to be the case. Remember evil is ‘that which is not moving towards, or is moving away from, God’. So if we can each be truthful enough to ourselves and decide which it is, then, yes we can see there is a way out, being that we all have Godliness inside of us.


As we mentioned before, ambivalence is a feed supply to narcissism in that while it may not actively detour or fight against it, ambivalence allows it to continue by not helping to stop it, by not making it conscious of itself. As for the 'it' of narcissism, 'it' does not want to see itself as it truly is and thus uses all the egoic processes it can pull together to manipulate the self as well as the selves around it. Those around it are usually weaker than it, for evil cannot control that which is stronger than it, unless they are very apt in manipulation and the other is very unconscious to its' Godliness.


Thus the psychological game of life continues to grow and grow, all the while rotating on the wheel of life known as Samsura, until we choose to stop the process of retribution and return. Until we are fed up having karma extracted as penitence via Fate, which usually just ends up making more karma for ourselves, as it is the ego in control and not our soul. Something is asleep on the job and we need to wake it up, our soul that is. Nobody likes to think evil exists and nobody wants to think of themselves as evil. Lets face it, it does and some of us are, weather we admit it or not, because somebody really does have to be that 'other guy'.


Poor Lucifer even got the bad rap of it. He was known, pre JC and Moses time, as the first-born Son of God, the bringer of the fire/light. As we brought him/her into our culture we made him ugly and monstrous. Yet, as with all the deities and as well as ourselves (for we are as well) these are just the dual manifestations of that specific energy. If you split pure energy in two, yin and yang, hot and cold, you see that one does not exist without the other in our world of dualities. Yet being conscious of it allows us the chance to transcend it, to not be affected by it.


However, in the case of us humans, only the conscious combination of the two energies will create the 'Totality'. Not meaning that we are not total without one another, a mate, but to really join with another we must be whole ourselves. Basically because creation of a Totality, is one of Godliness, total unconditionally loving conscious truth.


Try washing in only hot or in only cold water, there is a question in how do you know if it is hot or cold, contrast. But mix the two and you have beauty from that contrast, just as we do when two mates are united in their Godliness. So we continue to be ambivalent towards ourselves and our brothers for this and that reason and thus help to propagate evil amongst ourselves. In the meantime, we feed our own self-interests, narcissism and infect like a virus those under our tutelage.


We are all quite unconscious of a lot of this process as can be seen by all the suffering going on. Worse is when we see the evil and at least knowing it not to be right, we do nothing about it, and then we see the suffering and suffer even more from that. We are masters of our own processes and thus make ourselves suffer by not doing something, which we can, about the suffering. Simply put it all lacks consciousness and truthfulness of and to ourselves, and even if we fear things like how to accept and deal with it, we can bring in the unconditional part. But, without the conscious part, most of this cannot work.



When we grew up we always had someone telling us what to do. This was in most cases a basic learning process of life and manners, a basic method of parenting or nurturing. Basic in that our caregivers could only give us that which they had received or learned of, we could not be exposed to anything that our caregivers did not know of. As we aged and were capable of independent actions (thoughts as well, but it was the action people saw) we started to do our own will. Our own will was based upon the behavior and patterns we learned, and yes based upon whatever Fate had in store via our egos in order to pay penitence, to rebalance energies, that is to become conscious to some deed within us that needed correcting.


In most of the cases with our actions, we learned by ourselves what we did and did not like. Our ego would accept or reject something based upon the now formed super-ego, which is mostly our unconscious. Then with our new point of view (having added in the parents and society's egos) we found what was right and what was wrong, from that perspective. That is to say our super-ego is now the one that tells us o.k. for this and not o.k. for that.


However, many a time we did something for our own egoic reasoning, thinking it was ok or that no one would see, notice etc. These were the times that we had something to learn. These were the times when we got caught. This was the time when we paid by being chastised. Chastisement is from those who love us and are watching out for our soul, or at least this is what it is suppose to be. Given that not too many people are really conscious, most of this goes on unknowingly and in general it is safe to say that most people chastise their young ones in order to control them, to have power over them.


If we are reprimanded for a just reason and for our own protection and consciousness of what is going on, then we are being chastised. But if we are being told what to do or reprimanded for what the other wanted us to do but we did not without any real danger around or real psychological growth from the situation, then it is just narcissistic control. The word has two connotations and this is due to the fact the when we as humans view something it is with the eye of our ego or egoic thought. That thought has to do with our manner of living the experience, and let's face it, who wants to be told they did something wrong. Yet in reality, the word just means what it does, and as a word there is no emotions unless we give it some. The emotions generally come from the ego and are not of sound mind.


Our parents are the best example of what went on with this narcissistic control. Mom would chastise us for not putting on our coat when going outside and maybe catch a cold, thus protection of our physical being. Dad said put out the garbage and when we did not he would chastise us for it as he wanted to control our movements as in a egoic control, unless, he had said, you know child we all have to pitch in and work together as a family unit to get the chores done because we will all benefit from it and when you are older you will have good manners and habits to share with your family and friends.


There is a conscious and non-egoic method and there is an egoic one. The soul knows the difference, but the egos do not. So if you called it the ego then chances are it was of the soul and for the good process, for the soul does not fight such things, but the ego does until its' dissolution.



Whoa, that nasty religious sounding word coming back to haunt us from childhood. Yes it is because for most of us we do not understand its' function in the world and most of all we do not want to pay it, consciously or otherwise. Remember that we said that all is made up of the Law of Karma, balancing and paying debts and collecting receipts, and this is were it all happens. It is for and of the soul that we find the word in our lives. For most of us, we have forgotten religion, or even worst, we participate and yet do not know much of it, just saying that we are good people and thus doing good, so we deserve good and should not or do not have penitence to pay. Penitence does not erase it (the wrong deed, sin etc) only consciousness does.


Thankfully there is no real problem here. The system (of life and the cosmic laws) is such that it knows how to extract penitence if we have not awakened our soul to ourselves. It knows how to use the egos to 'lead us into temptation' and thus if we succumb to temptation penitence is extracted as we are now have a new karma to replace the old one making it even harder to wake up and be conscious. Oh well the wheel of Samsura keeps on turning. Repent ye sinners repent, is something all of us have heard and in most cases it bugs us in that we think (with our egos) feel (with our egos) that we have nothing to repent for. If our parents did it and taught us it, it is ok to do it.


JC said 'leave your parents and follow me, for if you are not like me you do not deserve me, unless you repent'.


If society does it then it must be ok. (Society is not moral; it is just a system in which the strongest narcissist is at the top). If my friends and neighbors do it then it must be ok. Thus, free for the blind to lead and follow the blind. As we have said a number of times the wheel of Samsura just keeps turning and turning.


Repenting is simply a conscious act of seeking forgiveness on our behalf of our inner being for what we did/do and hopefully will no longer do. It is like saying sorry for some wrong that we have done, willfully or by mistake. The challenge lies not in repenting or asking forgiveness for the wrong that was done, but in consciously knowing that we did/do something wrong. As we awaken and become more aware of ourselves, and those around us, we have the chance to loosen the bonds of chastisement and break the chains of Fate that have a hold on our egos. We can seek forgiveness for any inequities that we have created and find out that we no longer need to repent for the same action and that the Fate of it has dissolved.


If we choose to stay asleep on the job (of life) then we get to repeat and repeat all the things that Fate tempts us with in order to see if we did wake up. Remember, all the times we repeated the same things over and over only to promise ourselves that we would not do it again, or just shrugged, 'what is going on here, how come I repeated it, again'. Welcome consciously to the wheel of Samsura, the wheel of Fate, that will extract till your soul is awake and awaken it must or dissolve into whatever destiny is awaiting for us at the end of our cycle. (108 lives is what they tell us from the ancient of days).


Oh well, shi_ happens. Fortunately we get to try the 108 times and whatever we learn in one gets put onto our report card for the next session. Just don't forget to wake up to it.

Egos and Sins Tied In


By now we are sure that you had a good look at what the sins are and what the egos are. So if you are asking yourself how is it that they tie in, just think of the following and we are sure it will all fall into place. Since ancient times we have been mostly a God believing human race. We put reverence into what our life is and that of others. We respected Mother Earth and Father Knowledge for all the beauty it was. Then something happened on our way to the forum. Actually it did mostly in their time period of non-belief and feeding Christians to the lions.


We lost our beliefs as the system managed to tell us that we need this and that hierarchy to be at one with God. We allowed them (the hierarchy) to extract penitence from us and chastise us (egoically) just as they did. We gave up our freedom of choice over to the strongest one who had been teaching us whatever they wanted, when and how they wanted.


We fed the narcississim of society, which is really reflective of humanity, as the whole is made up of the sum of its' parts. So on it goes into modern time where we are so fed up with all the BS and decided just like the ego of the child being potty trained, not to give into anything and wait until we are good and ready. But just as the child will have to give in at some point, our Fate is there doing its' thing until we wake up. So all we managed to do is change the focus from them, (the system, society), to ourselves just like the child. Only thing is that we forgot that sooner or later it all has to come out and as with Fate it will extract that which is necessary.


So we just fed ourselves a bigger dose of narcissistic fodder and then became even more omnipotent and even less close to God than when we started off in this round of life. Yes, the strongest does survive in the animal kingdom, and in the human kingdom the strongest ego takes over, controls and survives (follows us) from one life to the next until we get it right. So a sin is simply an ego from within our 'ego' that has been given power and control over our soul and thus us.


In church they talk of 'stopping sins', in meditation that talk of 'dissolving the egos'. Both are the same, yet we still don't work at it at all.


Wake up or not; it is our freedom of choice to do, as we will. Just remember the lords' prayer says 'Thy will be done', meaning not mine, for mine is of the ego. But love of myself is from my soul at times. Germinate it and see what happens.

How to Be


We all really know within us how to be, it is just that, with all that is around us in the material world, we get caught up in it to such a point that we cannot make heads or tails out of how to really be. Our ego confuses us as it sees its' demise on the horizon. Fate tests us to see if we really have the resolve to go through with it.


Try one simple thing first.


Find time for our self. Go to our favorite spot and relax. No music, no people, just calm and quite. If we find our mind thinking of too many things and bouncing all around, then try humming a sound of a kind that will not bring us to singing but just peace of mind, like the humming of a bird, bug, or our nurturer rocking us. If we are still thinking and cannot reach into meditate, at least think good things, such as who are the people in our life we most admired for who they were/are, and what qualities did they have. We are sure that we will not be describing their egos, but their virtues.


Start living that way. Go back to church by our self to find our inner peace. If we are going to church already then change it to another one to reunite with what is really drawing us there. Love of life, from deep within.


Next, take one question that has been perturbing us (as long as it is not who created the creator) and then go out and find the answer. Better still, meditate, pray, supplicate and repent till we get the answer and as any one who has done so will substantiate, we will get the answer. Knock and someone will answer, just be sure to be listening not for what we want to hear, but for the truth, good bad or ugly as our ego may say.


In the every day life, we need to try with all our mind (there are a few levels) so be aware of what is going on all around us. Be conscious. See the beauty in everything, even the ugly beggar or the fool can teach us something or other. It is all dual and we have been looking at it through the eyes of ego for so long that we forgot what the soul sees. Ask it and if it is awake enough it will show us. Remember it is said that it waits and waits for us to come back to it. But the most important of all is to love our self, consciously and unconditionally, as this will be extended into the family. 'Do unto others as you would have them do unto you' is what life with our fellow humans is all about.


God is love, conscious, unconditional with a pure truth. Love is living life to its' fullest and living life is being and sharing consciously, unconditionally and truthfully. See what just happened, we became a real conscious part of God. We all can. Namaste to us.

Transcend the Ego and all is possible: as all is known beyond it.


We all want to be happy. Yet our egoic mind maintains its' right to keep our unhappiness.


We all want to have a good life. Yet our ego puts us through more gyrations than a roller coaster.


We all want to be good and caring to others, and we have the words that we repeat to ourselves all the time to prove that we are.


The problem with these statements is that they are all wants, which are derived from the ego. They are not virtues that we are living here and now, nor are they aspirations of what we would like to live. They are just the ego babbling away of our lot in life; pretending we are this or that, make believing without actually being.


Transcend it all. Be above it all. Not in a haughty or arrogant way, but without allowing it to affect us, to 'get to you'. Understand the cause and effect of it. Become conscious of what is going on inside of you and what is happening to and by you.


There are many motivational writers and speakers who can help shed some light on this and get us on the right track. There are a lot of religious communities that are now opening to more and more 'new age' thinking and thus mannerisms.  There are a lot of self-help groups and classes both in the old age and new age that can lend a hand. Try one, anyone to start and we will find what we do not like and thus conversely, what we do like.


Transcending the ego is the only answer, but we must start somewhere. We must allow ourselves the time for ourselves without the ego telling us what to do. If we can find the time then we can find the way. Life is a journey along which there are many stops that must and need to be made. This is the most important one, for without this focus we will not really know what we need to do and thus what our real mission in life is. Without our mission we are like a fish out of water and with one we can work magic.


Once we tap into the magic, once we see it clearly happening to us, then we can start to become co-creators of it and thus we can start to be all we can for ourselves and then for those around us.


When we transcend the ego and go into the realm of magic we start to live as God really intended us to. We start to be our soul and we start to see what is really out there in this great big beautiful cosmos. We may have and may still see something that is not so beautiful, but for now just write it off as part of our duality in this world and thus part of seeing the beauty and living it.


All the great masters, prophets, saviors, messiahs are awaiting our call upon them in order to attain there help. And help they will if we ask. Unfortunately as it is said of a million that place a call only one continues to communicate with the divine and of the million that communicate only one stays and does the work on the path to consciousness.


Is it really easier to stay asleep? Sometimes even I wonder….

Sexual Analysis to Sexual Healing


As Freud worked out, 'discovered' in his work on our psyche leading to psychoanalysis, all of our challenges and problems of the mind have their base in our innate basic sexuality. This is mainly, as he pointed out, due to the fact that as an organism we seek propagation (others added predation) to continue ourselves.


He never managed to tap into the 'Id' and just called it our primary chaos of instincts and the subconscious.


To us this is the very seat of the seed of our soul that lies wanting to be germinated and awaken. This in itself can be understood on both the psychological side as well as the spiritual side. If as Freud said, the Id is the basic chaos of our inner workings as well as our instincts, and as we grow we can experience many things others don't (due to a variety of reasons, such as awakening our conscious) then it holds to the fact that as the soul must be grown and must be awaken, as it is with us at birth, thus, for our analysis it is inside the Id which is the chaos and basic instincts. This can be viewed as in the duality in egos and sins, as both are the same. So our Id in psychology is our soul in spirituality.


When we are newborns the only thing we seek is nourishment and this develops into a love object. The love object could then be male or female, as we know no difference. At this point Fate is already at work as we interface with our caregivers who are good or bad towards us, based upon what Fate attached to us as we were born and what karmic situation we must live with those caregivers. This karmic process is either the receiving of payment for past and present virtues or the extraction of penitence for unbalancing the universal harmonic energies in previous incarnations.


So, 'do unto others as you would have them do unto you' comes into play as we repeat the actions of past lives, this time perhaps the karma is being done to us.  


As we grow through our psychological situations and thus into our own psyche creating our future behavior patterns we also experience areas that are problematic, with the most common ones being 'under' or 'not developed' and the next being erroneous methods that will stay with us for a life time, unless we become conscious of them.


As it is stated in 'Pista Sophia Unveiled' (ancient esoteric wisdom), we must pay karma for past deeds and thus Fate has attached itself to us in order to make sure that this is done by using the egos of the mind in performing this function and thus as spirituality says, 'leads us not into temptation' and tests our resolve to wake up from our 'sins'.


Added on to this, is the fact that in more situations than we want to believe or accept, are the really tough problems that have in fact created a trauma, an abuse of some kind. What ever the manner that the parent (as it usually is, but not always) miss treated us to the point of our needing to setup a coping mechanism, it stays with us and becomes repressed within, externalizing in many different ways, which is just as detrimental to our mental health as the act that was done to us.


From all of this we have the present state of decline within our human race which, as the number of beings grows, so does the number of these kind of situations, and it extrapolates from there. The sins propagate themselves simply by the fact that as egos, which we all have and understand little of (or use to defend ourselves with or cope in the world), we believe that we are good and all is well within.


If what we grew up with is bad, how would we know good? The only real way is the soul and its' mission of total enlightenment.


With all of this, when we arrive into teen years, the bases of our sexuality is created. From this point on we then act out and further pursue the same line of discovery, investigation and ultimately our behavior pattern for life. As we have setup our values, morals and the like from our caregivers, which were their egos injected into us, we now have a super-ego of parental and society authority telling us what to do. Right or wrong, as un-awaken beings we just repeat by rote which we learned through what was taught to us without any analysis of good or bad, right or wrong.


If they had such and such sin, we mostly likely have the same one because of transference of the ego and thus the perpetuation of erroneous behaviors, known or unknown. If we have been exposed to inappropriate behavior from someone during this time, it registers in our psyche as a pattern, as we learn things and then repeat them as being ours.


We will also, if the Id, ego and super-ego are in conflict; create a coping manner such as repressing the action into our sub-conscious. This repression will stay locked up until it is worked out. Sort of like the soul is made aware of the situation and has been given the task to watch over it all and figure out a way to make that which is unconscious, conscious. At this point it would seem that the iceberg is getting bigger at the bottom and not at all smaller above water.


As we are not conscious of what has gone on with us, all we can do is live the best way we can and to the best of our abilities, carrying the repressed stuff as a backpack. This in itself leads us into further kinds of 'wrong' or 'erroneous' and 'egoic' actions. Egoic because it is the ego that is dictating what we can and cannot do.


From a humoristic point of view, it is as if Fate gave a job to the ego to do but even the ego will not listen and do it. But as Fate must be, we can be sure that it will figure out a way to do so, that is if what the ego is doing is not what Fate needs it to do.


Awakened a little and knowing what is in the backpack, we can transcend it all, which is the mission of the soul, and awaken to become fully conscious.


Given the conflict that is built up between the ego and the super-ego we become unstable as to what is right and what is wrong. Even though the material maybe repressed, as with all psychoses, it must externalize itself somehow. Thus we develop character 'flaws'; that is to say psychological characteristics that are not strengths but weaknesses. This is the coping mechanism. However, it does not heal itself and we can literally live our lives in a state of instability from our psychological manners. This conflict is really the want of Fate due to our sins and will remain as such until we change, which most of us do not want to do. Most of us are not conscious of our sins just as we are not conscious of our own egos, only of what we (the ego) want us to be conscious of.


The externalization of the psychoses is in fact the soul trying to get a message to us that it is bottled up inside and that something is wrong with us. As we age the externalization can change from one thing to another, but it will still be there, nudging us and gnawing at us, something is missing, something is not right.


This instability in the case of our sexuality is usually manifested in the ways we have heard of or seen ourselves, and from all points of view, is what has given women a very bad rap and some men as well. If women were miss treated in some way and grew up believing from the super-ego (were parental and society morals are) that this is the way things are and everyone will treat them as such, they then come to expect it, come to seek it out and thus become it, for they do not know anything else, anything better, or at least any change is not acceptable to the super ego and the coping is necessary.


The soul is not in the picture of this instability as it is of the mind and the heart is hurting and thus paralyzed. Women are easy prey for a lot of these problems due to the sexual energy that they contain, being the bearers of children and thus more refined. They will act from the ego as all damage has made the soul even more of a prisoner of the Id, the subconscious. Remember the ego can only repeat things, it cannot use logic as the soul does, for God is not there, as God/Love is conscious in the heart, which is hurting or damaged and sent into the subconscious to cope with it all.


In all parts of behaviorism we could say that if we treat someone as the image they portray, then they will not disappoint us and thus act as that image, which most likely was a coping mechanism in the first place. Things are not always as they appear to be. When we awaken our soul, even a little, we start to see the soul of others and thus we can see the difference between the ego and the soul. The image is of ego; conscious love is of the soul.


Just as many a man shows the image of a tough guy, he can just as easily be a softy inside but the coping image of a tough guy was needed in order to survive some wrongdoing towards him as he grew up. He was shown the egos of another, learned to repeat them and then did not allow for the soul's growth, awakening. Those teaching him had the same phenomenon growing up themselves. 


So we have a matrix of people that were in one way or another problematically raised and portray images of what they really are not deep inside, their psyche. Look at ourselves in the mirror and we can understand what is meant. Many actors play the movie of life, and those are of the ego/super-ego mix. It is not the real self, but the one created by the growing being in order to cope and do the best they could.


At this point we actually have the blind leading the blind, for the parents are just repeating in some form or another what happened to them and what their egos dictated. 'Thou shall not create false images' is one of the commandments and this in and of itself refers to our 'God' (Love) that is within. While we do manage to cope through most of this, we also manage to keep the soul asleep, as we do not take any direct action to awaken it. 'Let those who have eyes see, and those who have ears hear' was meant to be of ourselves (as do most of the sayings) but we have been too busy living our egos to be ourselves.


Just think, somebody starts an ego and then 2000 years later everybody in the world (just about) is doing the same. What power, what control, what unconsciousness.


So our sexuality becomes one based in the ego and thus of instincts, of what we learned and were taught to do, willingly or not. It is not of our free will, for that is still un-developed within the Id, which is the unknown chaos within all beings. We did not learn to attach our sexuality to the soul's awakening for consciousness and thus have rutted and thus sinned, (fornication is the sin and even if we are married we can still end up doing the fornicating with our wife) perhaps unknowingly as many believe, but also with a gnawing feeling that something is not right.


Sexuality when used and of the soul can set us free from the bonds of Fate. So far we have just become as sheep, following one another and not really knowing where we are going, unconscious and without our inner guide in full state of awaken-ness.  We just repeat whatever and ultimately create our own unhappiness. So we need to be as lambs with the Christ as our guide, helping to awaken us from our egos. This will give us true happiness, as we will then be our true selves and thus a true being, not an egoic one.


So now we know that something is wrong and as long as we just say that it is all this way and there is nothing we can do about it, or that just as the others are doing so can we, or worst, that because our caregivers taught us it must be true; we cannot accept (as we do not understand) to change it; that is to make it right.


Jesus the Christ said 'leave your parents/rulers and follow me, for if you do not believe in me you do not deserve me'. What is meant to our soul by this is that as we know something is wrong, not right, we need to look at the way we got to this point, how we formulated our egos and super-ego and whatever is bad/weaknesses we need to change it into good/strengths. Just because someone taught us something, does not mean that it is right, unless we have investigated it using our soul and not our egoic mind and thereby experienced the truth of it. The mind will make us believe whatever the egos need it to in order to keep control and perhaps cope psychologically against the truth.


Yet as we all know that the truth will set us free and allow the healing of all wounds to start, we literally lie to ourselves and believe that we are not suffering inside. We just pull it all in and say that we are going to be happy. Just remember that the egos want to maintain our unhappiness, so that they stay in control. 

As many so-called human beings miss treated those in their care, we have a number of generations that have a lot more psychological problems than in the past. We have too many people acting in manners that are not conducive to their own mental and physical health, especially were our sexuality is concerned. As it goes, 'lust is the path to evil' and this can be seen as we ignore our soul's awakening and growth for the sake of a few minutes of pleasure instead of days of ecstasy and years of bliss. If we stop the transference now, then we will be able to build a better tomorrow, for tomorrow is now.


Sexuality is good and with sensuality first leads to the road of discovering our real inner being and waking up our Id to re-write our ego and super-ego as we would have it, lovingly and not as it was fed to us, controlling us, then it leads us to the divinity of ourselves, to God/Love within that is waiting to be recognized.


Duality exists and it is what we really need to understand within ourselves so that we can shift over into that which is consciously awakening our soul within, as well as that of our mates. The egos are fighting tooth and nail and betting that we do not wake up. How do we know that we have a problem and how can we fix it? From the spiritual point we know things are going downhill fast and thus something is wrong, something needs to be fixed. What?


Take your pick, psychological egos or spiritual sins, both one and the same. The first part is somewhat straight forward, behavior patterns are the first give away and then if we venture into some psychological character testing we will find the things that are not within what the system calls the 'norm'. The norm being made up of those with and those without problems and thus looking at the details of what makes to two different. If we look at those character tests, we will see that a lot of the questions are of a moral and thus a spiritual nature.


Now the psychologist is not going to have you think in terms of 'God' when answering, but as you do you will notice the duality of the ego/sin situation. A lot of us that have left the religious system, or attend in body but not really in mind, did so as it did not fit our egoic conception of what we could or could not do, and what we wanted to do with the soul awaken or not.


As for the fixing part, this is where sexual healing comes in. As we know, sexual energy is the strongest energy around as it is what propagates us, and the universe around us, and as we mentioned before, most of us are in the instinctual level and thus just sexing with it and nothing more. At least with birth control we have a lot less people on earth than without, given our behavior patterns of rutting.


Tantric/yoga sex practices are specifically what we are talking of. What is needed in this process, is a very loving and understanding couple that is really in love with each and are willing to handle any difficulties that will arise during the healing process. Each will more than likely discover things that they did not realize existed either in themselves or in their partner, especially in the case of abuse or trauma in upbringing.


We need to create what is known as the 'Perfect Couple' as it exists within us, but we are just asleep to it. Our soul knows it is there and is waiting for its' chance to make it happen. This conscious love can move mountains, or as it says 'the one with as much faith as a mustard seed' can move mountains. Faith in your soul's divinity to do what true love can do, heal. The soul knows all and with help from the energies of Love/God, it will be revealed as we awaken. 'God/Love will not try/give us more than what we can handle'. Without this commitment to help ourselves heal we cannot heal the other either. We need to be in unison as both energies are required.


What this allows for is the fusing of two loves that will overcome the blockage, as it is an energy blockage from repression and once unblocked, healing can begin. As the saying goes 'any two people meeting and acting in the thought and action of God, will have it done'. If we do not awaken our own soul, then we cannot help another awaken. 'First take the thorn out of your eye so that you can help your brother see'. If we are two consciously loving soul's with faith, in ourselves and in the other, then we can move that mountain.


Once the focus is set on what we are trying to do then we can start the process. Without focus, as with the focus of the soul's mission to awaken consciousness, where are we really going, what are we going to work on? There are a number of self-help books out there that deal with the art of sexuality between two lovers from a vast array of manners and ways to proceed. What is not wanted in this process is to make it a focus of a sex practice for whatever better 'rutting' manners you have been doing up till now. We want to find 'intimate sensuality leading to sexuality' and this will allow for the opening of the energies that are blocked by the repression and thus bring out what was repressed.


The art of tantric yoga/sex is the bases for all of this healing process and once we become exposed to it, we will begin to see what it is all about and why it works. However, buyer beware as it can be misused for unscrupulous ways.


At some point a mental health professional maybe needed in order to deal with the new realities that have been exposed. This will necessitate a commitment from both parties to under go whatever is needed in order to understand what has happened. If either of the two have shown an interest in psychology, then it is possible to at least get things underway and start the development, as when we are conscious, we become our own best psychologist.


In the practical aspect of the healing process; that is as the couple in loving embrace, what we need to do is listed as follows, in general terms. It is not all-inclusive and we should consult one of the many great books written on sexual intimacy that will get us on the road to healing. The soul is waiting for just such a chance at being one with the us, that is for us to be our real self, as such we will be making the 'Perfect Couple'. 


We may not always succeed in tapping into that inner mystery the way we would like to. We may not be able to fully unblock the repression. And, we may not get to the bottom of our process, as the ego is strong and has many manners of fooling us and staying in control, thus alive. But, what we will get is a better understanding as to who the two of us are, a better appreciation for each other, more reverence for each other and thus more real conscious love for each other.

We will in fact start to become enlightened beings, real humans. It is not a failure not to get to the bottom of the psychoses; it is a failure to not create that intimacy that is so lacking in just about all relationships. If anything we will have built a better couple and that is success in the process, the evolution of life. Thus, creating or working on creating a 'Perfect Couple' can only bring about great things for all involved.